Mirror mirror on the wall, am I really
the fairest of them all? I feel like I'm limiting your options here.
Maybe there are other items of furniture out there you'd find fair,
and you're just telling me what I want to hear. God, what am I doing
asking a magical mirror to offer comment on the subjective nature of
human attractiveness? I really shouldn't be dependent on such a
hollow endorsement of my appearance. We're talking about a mirror
with a conscious mind here, and I'm using it to maintain my ego. What
the hell is wrong with me?
I'm sorry mirror, you could have any
number of things going on and all I do is ask you to confirm if I'm
pretty or not. I suppose I've been feeling a bit vulnerable lately.
But it could be worse- I could be talking to furniture which doesn't
talk back! Ha ha! But seriously, all the times you've said I'm the
fairest in the land, did you really mean it? I know you've got your
own problems and everything, but I'd really like to know. No, forget
it. What's going on with you? We've
never really sat down and just talked, you know? Just don't don't ask
me if you're the fairest of all the mirrors! Ha ha! How would I even
know? I don't know what makes a fair mirror. Not that I'm not saying
you're not fair, it's just
that with mirrors...
Oh
god, I've made such a mess of this, I'm so sorry. I just wanted to be
your friend and now I think I've just said something offensive to
your people. Look, I understand that your ideas of attraction, if
any, are probably directed towards other mirrors rather than human
women, but I don't know where to go from here. Can I just leave you
by the stoop and let you make your own destiny? You can't really move
by yourself. How does it work for your kind? Oh god, that sounded
small minded again. How... look, you know what? Forget it. You are my
mirror and I will damn well tell what you're good for.
Now say that this dress was worth fifty quid.
Now say that this dress was worth fifty quid.
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